People told me it was just a phase, but like many things when you
are a Mom, when you are in the middle of a phase, it seems like it will never
end. I had terrible visions of a child who would never want to leave me and
would be left in the school playground crying while all the other children had
fun.
Of course, in the end, it was just a phase and about six months
later he started to grow out of it and became more social. Now, he has several
friends he likes to spend time with and is much more confident in social
situations. I still worried though, that he wouldn't be able to do anything
without me, such a constant have I been in his life. With school on the horizon
I hoped that he would be okay on his own, but inside I was still panicking
about him being that child crying at the school gate.
In the past few weeks though he has proved me wrong big time. It
started with a train journey. After a fun session at our Playcentre one of the other moms was taking her
son and another boy home on the train - a short journey back to our town. These
boys were both friends with Monkey but we had our car so I was planning to
drive back. She said to Monkey that maybe one time he could go on the train
with them and he decided that was the time, there and then. I was apprehensive
and waited near the train station in case he changed his mind, but the next
time I saw him was at the station at the other end after a successful journey.
This term at Playcentre, I've also been able to leave Monkey on
session by himself rather than having to stay to look after him.
And then, as if those things weren't enough to start allaying my
fears, he decided to stay overnight with his grandparents. This might not seem
like a big deal to many people, but our family all lives overseas so Monkey
only sees his grandparents for about six weeks every year. He has spent plenty
of time alone with them but we have always been slightly reluctant for him to
stay overnight in case he got scared in the middle of the night. This visit,
though he decided that he wanted to stay overnight so we took the plunge and
packed his bag.
He did it and he was fine.
The upside of this was that Hubby and I
found ourselves with an impromptu date night. It felt strange but we made the
most of it and ate dinner at somewhere other than our house for the first time
in ages. We walked to the local restaurant and we walked back even though it
was really late and we both had a drink because neither of us had to get up the
following morning and play with Lego.
We did it all over again the following weekend when Monkey decided
he wanted to stay out again.
And bit by bit, my school gate fears are subsiding. My little
Monkey is becoming independent. And it is great. After all, much as we might
want to hold on to them forever, our role as parents is to nurture our children
so they can live independently and stand on their own two feet. Based on the
past few weeks I think Monkey is well on his way to achieving that.
- Three Becomes Five - The Power of 3
- Five Things I Love About My Son - The Power of 3