Wednesday, 16 January 2013

Apparently, I'm Not a Real Mom According To This Hunger Games Star

I'm usually pretty laid back about being the mom of an only child - after all it is my choice - and usually I don't rise to people's comments about how I do want another child really or that I should give my son a sibling. But, when this post from The Stir blog popped up on my Google Reader today something touched a nerve.

Apparently, Elizabeth Banks who is an actress in the Hunger Games (I admit I haven't seen this film and I don't really have any idea who Elizabeth Banks is) thinks that she is only officially a mom now she has two children. What was she doing before that - just pretending?

In an interview with People Banks said:
“Two is very different from one. When you have one kid, you feel like you can jet set around and you can throw him on the hip and you get your life done. You don’t realise how easy one is until you have two. Now I’m really a mom. Oh, I am a mom now! This is for serious — I am responsible for two people now.”

Apparently I'm not a real mom

Now like Julie Ryan Evans who wrote the post on The Stir, I'm sure that Banks' life has changed since having her second child and she is probably right that it is easier to do things with just one, but suggesting that you aren't a real mom until you have more than one child is just insulting.

I have an only child by choice, but many people don't. For some women there is only one chance and that is that even if they would like more children and no matter how many times they try. To suggest that they aren't real moms is a terrible thing.  Maybe the quote was taken out of context, maybe it wasn't and I'm sure Banks probably didn't mean to offend, but I wish people and celebrities in particular would sometimes think before they open their mouths.

Banks did little to redeem herself later in the interview when she decided to talk about how difficult it was to survive looking after her children without a nanny - for 10 days! I was about to give her some credit back or doing it herself until I realised it was just over the holiday period. Oh for the life of a Hollywood starlet!

I'm going to take a deep breath and let it go now but I'd be interested to know what you think. Did your feelings about being a mom change when you had a second child? As a mother of just one do you feel like a real mom?

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